Gloom, Despair, and Agony

Hee Haw guys

The paranormal world is one big question mark most of the time. Search and discovery is part of the allure. But lately it feels like the normal world is an even bigger mystery to me. No one has all the answers, but it’s really hard to see a loved one suffer, but not be able to help. Any suggestions or ideas fall on deaf ears when a troubled soul is wallowing in their own suffering. They fall into a pit of despair and can’t see their way out.

I’ve had my fair share of miserable times, and worked hard to climb out of them. But sometimes, people just don’t have it in them. Life has kicked them in the head a few too many times and they don’t have the strength to pull themselves up to go another round. They lose their equilibrium and can’t see light anywhere. It’s painful to watch. Even more painful when you try to be of service and end up doing or saying something to make it worse.

Some wear the Cloak of Misery as comfortably as they do their own skin.  No matter what kind of advice I offer, it is immediately rejected. The claiming is that they’ve already tried every option available without results. Everything said goes through an already clogged filter and translates to more sludge they have to wade through.

What can I do to help someone so bogged down in their own problems they’ve adopted it as their identity?

The only answer I have left is to allow them to be what they chose to be. If they chose to remain miserable and unyielding in their perspective, I am left to listen, sympathize, provide tissue to dry the tears, and nod about how cruel the world can be. Emotional support is all I have left in my tool box at the moment. And when part of your profession involves giving advice, that can be a jagged little pill to swallow.

But just because I counsel people doesn’t mean I have all the answers. No one does.  And I do believe in free will, which means the afflicted have the choice to change how they think and feel about their problems. Only they have the power to change, even when their circumstances remain the same. I often think of prisoners of war, trapped, without any way to change their situation. What keeps them going when they appear to have no hope? Perspective – how they chose to think and feel.

What goes on in our minds is proprietary. We are the guardians and emperors of our consciousness -rulers of our mental empires. We decide what to think and feel about our circumstances. And have the free will to accept or reject any advice offered. We choose.  We either sing that old Hee Haw song “Gloom, despair, and agony on me” or engage our minds with constructive and satisfying thoughts. I’m of the mind that I create my environment, so when the world kicks me when I’m down, I seek sanctuary in a nest of beauty, love, comfort, creativity, and escapism.

We all feel alone and unloved at some point. So self-love and care is essential.

So when a loved one chooses not to act on advice, the only thing I have left to offer is a shoulder to cry on. But over time, that can wear me down and make me feel like a welcome mat in a mud room, available only to scuff dirty shoes clean. Then I have resort to taking my own advice, doing everything possible to lift my own spirits.

“I Want To Put A Curse on Somebody!” she cried.


I work part time at a new age gift shop that supplies items for magical ritual and self enhancement. For the most part, the majority of patrons hail from the “harm none” community. But everything has its shadow side.

One customer announced in no uncertain terms, “I want to put a curse on somebody.” Then, of course, she wanted to know what ingredients needed to do this. Sorry, can’t help you. I don’t believe anyone has the right to interfere with someone else’s free will, unless my life is being threatened. I do believe in the right to defend myself.

But with diplomacy and grace the second-in-command sweetly asked, “Would you have wish someone to do this to you?”

The customer answered “no” then launched into the terrible tale of her target.

Here’s the thing: Two wrongs never make a right. Sometimes it can create a lengthy and costly battle that neither party wins. No matter how horribly someone treats you, doing anything to inflict harm as payback will only bite you in the butt down the road. And mirroring someone’s act of wrong-doing does not make you any better than they are. I have a lot of experience in that area.

Proactively attacking the problem with from a more positive position can produce a better result for all parties. I resisted this theory for many years, but with experimentation, I learned that the high road – while paved in self-righteousness and dusted with grains of conceit and judgment – is the safest, most diplomatic path away from injustice.

“You can catch more flies with honey than you can vinegar.” The same goes for kindness. Even angry, vengeful people find it difficult to not reciprocate when someone smiles at them and treats them kindly. If this behavior annoys them or makes them uncomfortable, they make a speedy exit. Walking away or removing yourself from the equation might be the only option to diffusing the drama.

In my youth I was a pretty miserable piece of work. My parents battled constantly and I was the alien being they had not planned on, but was stuck with. I was shoe-horned into jobs I hated for corporations I did not appreciate. Conformity did not allow me to live my truth and created some very dark, angry years. I had been mistreated, and in some instances, gave as good as I got. Always with regret. Yet, I never imagined actually “putting a curse” on anyone who abused or mistreated me. Fantasized, sure. But wishing that a person receives their comeuppance is different than initiating any form of retaliation.

Thankfully, in the case of the customer, my co-worker prescribed a manner of reversing the energy of the “bad guy” right back to them. The same principle as holding up mirror. Therefore, the negativity was deflected from her and “return to sender.”

It is perfectly human to have ill feelings against another, but search your conscience for the consequences of meddling with someone else. If you chose to proceed, use caution. Be prepared to battle more negative energies, to a higher degree, than had you left well enough alone.

If you don’t want to cover your behind, be kind.

Josh Gates’ New Show in January

Josh Gates

I’m looking forward to Expedition Unknown, and Josh’s humor, especially on a show that isn’t about chasing monsters.’Expedition-Unknown’-Searches-for-Truth-Behind-World’s-Iconic-Legends.aspx

A Day Late

I ran out of time yesterday. Story of my life.

Yesterday was National Book Lover’s day, the day after Halloween, and The Day of the Dead. And I missed them all. Hoping yours was fabulous.

book lover witches potdia de los muertos gates

Ghost Tourist Beware!

man in fog

What do you expect when you go on a Ghost Tour?

Call me crazy, but I expect to hear stories of ghosts and paranormal activity.

In the seven stories our host told on the Ghost Tour in Winston-Salem, NC, only two featured ghosts, and one was told from the ghost’s point of view, making it nothing more than a story. Only one spoke of an eyewitness experience with the ghostly form of a deceased man. The rest were of murder mysteries and interesting tidbits of local history completely void of any paranormal elements. Finding an unidentified body after a fire does not imply the location is haunted, nor does an unsolved triple-homicide. But the stories often concluded with such suggestions.

“Could the restless specter of the homeowner be wandering the halls searching for her murderer who was not brought to justice?”

Unless someone reported an experience of that nature, I’m guessing not.

I had no issue with the telling of the tales. Our host was a skilled storyteller. My problem was that most were void of anything paranormal. The bored behaviors of several others in the group said they shared my opinion. A couple guys checked email on their cell phones and one woman actually took a few steps away from the crowd to take a business call – at eight PM. Had this tour been titled The Mysteries of West End instead of Ghost Walk, I would have been completely satisfied. But pedaling ghosts as a marketing ploy is misleading. If there are no real reports of sightings or other paranormal activities from locals, the only haunting will be your disappointment of having paid $15 to be hoodwinked.

Every city seems to have latched onto the paranormal cash cow. If you think about it, every place is likely to have a spirit or two hanging about, minding its own business. Ask around before deciding on a Ghost Tour. If you want the real details, seek a historian. If you want entertainment, enjoy the stories, no matter how silly. But be courteous to your host. They are typically actors doing their best to make a living by performing. Whether you like their performance or not, stay off your devices. Pay attention, you might learn something that makes it all worthwhile.

What did I learn?

The road between a church and the graveyard is typically called casket road.

The Scottish call spirit horses kelpies.

Never sneak out of the house to meet a forbidden lover. You might get shot.

Never go on a tour without asking a local about it first.

31 Days of Spook – Colonial Park Cemetery


Another great heads-up from my friend, Bacon. Best ghost footage I’ve seen.

Originally posted on Piglove:

Hello ghouls and ghosts – Mom/dad vacation yearly in historic Savannah, Georgia, I thought today I would focus on a wonderful cemetery in Savannah. Mom/dad have been here often and walked among the graves and tombstones… and perhaps some living and unliving. Makes you wonder, doesn’t it?

The cemetery I’m focusing on today is the Colonial Park Cemetery. It was established in 1750 and has been restored. It is located at the corner of Abercorn and Oglethorpe Streets in Savannah, Georgia. What an amazing archway they have to enter into the cemetery. This cemetery is amazing – so mom/dad says – snorts. I wouldn’t know first hoove but mom/dad did give me a lot of information by phone last night.

There are over 10,000 people buried here; however, there are only around 1,000 grave markers. Many people were buried in mass graves, others have had their grave markers knocked over…

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Gone Over Gone Girl

gone girl

Dig creepy stories this time of year? If you haven’t read Gone Girl or seen the film yet, do both.

It’s creepy.

Really creepy.

So much so (and I mean that in the best possible way) it should be classified as horror. The twisted, psychotic, unthinkable kind that has you looking at people you know differently.

Jillian Flynn wrote the screenplay for the film as well as the book. Even though there are small differences, in the interest of reducing nearly five hundred pages down to one forty five, they’re subtle and don’t change the outcome.

Forget possessed dolls, people with masks, and screaming and bloodshed. Who needs campy fabricated fear? It is far more frightening to be married to a psychopath who is always one step ahead of everyone.

Watch the trailer here:

31 Days of Spook – Winchester Mystery House


My little friend Bacon posted this interesting data on the Winchester House.

Originally posted on Piglove:


It’s getting closer my friends – the day that we look forward to once a year – Halloween.  Just a couple of more days now.  Until then, here is Day 28 of my 31 Days of Spook.

Today, I’m focusing on the Winchester Mystery House.  Have you heard about this mansion that is located in San Jose, California?  Have you been there?  It’s claimed that some people are there and they have never left.

The Winchester Mystery House is just that – a mystery.  It was the residence of Sarah Winchester.


In 1862, she  married William Winchester – who came from the family that created the famous Winchester guns.  Everything seemed like it was grand and wonderful …for a while.

In 1866, the Winchester’s infant daughter, Annie, passed away from a childhood disease called marasmus.  (Marasmus is a form of severe malnutrition and causes a child to look emaciated.)  Losing…

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Out of the Box

This video is worth a couple minutes.

Click and smile.

Latest Life After Death Study


Consciousness is not in the brain, or the heart.


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